Playground Promiscuity

Today we were playing Lacrosse on the school in PE (like the cool kids we are), divided into two teams, the girls and the boys. Now you would think if anyone was going to be a bit obscene suring the game it was going to be the lads right?

Wrong.

 I was going after the ball trying to catch it after a bad throw from the girls team, when one of the girls jumps in my way shouting "FUCK OFF" and intercepts the ball while I'm standing there, shocked at what just happened...

Although the true pinnacle of their crudeness occurred when they said possibly one of the most innocent things at all... Girl #1 is stuck with nobody to pass to near her, when Girl #2 comes running behind her to give her some help, and in doing so notifies her with the words "I'M COMING UP YOUR REAR!"

I'm not sure whether these words were more of a worry than a relief to Girl #1...

Careers, Universities and Fish

Today we had some speakers for the organisation "Aim Higher" come into our class to give us a talk about opportunities in further education.

The first activity they gave us was a list of possible courses that could be taken at degree level, such as Golf Course Management and Peace Politics, but the list had a few red herrings in there too. These false friends included made up courses like Orange Peeling Studies and things...

The one that made us laugh however, was "Fish Stress and Gaelic" which is of course a fake course. The girl sat next to me was astonished that anyone would come up with such a thought. So one of the speakers says, "but it could exist" To which my friend replied, with no pun intended, "Fish stress? Fish don't get stressed! They're just swimming around, having a WHALE of a time".

Perhaps what made this even fractionally humorous was the fact that, even for several seconds afterwards, she couldn't work out what she'd just said that was funny...