China Town

Today I had the most awesome day in the city. I went with the 6ft 5" lad and my Chinese friend.

We got up to all sorts of stuff, and I came home feeling full to the brim with all of the various chinese foods. "Try this! Want to try some of this? Ok! How about some of this?" You can see a pattern developing here...

During brunch in a chinese restaurant, she said she could get us a fork if we wanted, despite being with all of her chinese family. Or we could just use the spoon... But naturally I refused, saying my "chopstick skills are ninja!" Upon reflection, they were adequate, but perhaps not quite ninja... None the less, I tried, and when all else failed, I resorted to spoon for picking up what she called, "goo".

In all honesty, I guess it was goo... although everything else was quite nom-worthy. Hence the stomache ache I guess...

Wires, Wires, Everywhere...

Today has been one of the quietest days this half term... My family has gone off to see my sister at uni, leaving me behind. Literally, they drove right past me.

Anyway, I found a new app for my phone. Liking toys like this I wanted to get it working as soon as possible, but it required me to delete some of the memory to fit it on.

I scrambled round the house trying to find an appropriate cable when I realised where one must be. I looked in the "box of wires and things", yes, that is the official title. And sure enough, there it was. Right in the middle of the tangled mass of plastic horribleness.

I spent an hour trying to untangle it, before finally I'd had enough. I pulled both ends hard enough for a little bit of each to stick out either side of the wiring abyss. To cut a short story shorter, my phone is now connected to my laptop in a mess larger than the laptop itself... Thank you Blackberry, for making my phone truly "wireless"...

Concerts...

I went to a concert last night, the awesome Darwin Deez, with a group of frineds.

One of my friends, not exactly the normal candidate for an evening like that came with us. She seemed to really enjoy herself, as the band was really great, energetic, and as I think i've already covered, downright awesome...

The only thing was, we didn't know which support acts would be playing. The second of the two support bands was Little Comet, who were pretty darn good. The first however was called "Sizzling Gypsies". They weren't that bad, but lets just say they weren't exactly up her street...

Thank god they were only on for half an hour, 'cause she looked as if she was going to kill herself...

Excuses excuses...

Mirror mirror on the wall, who's the laziest of them all? Why thank you. You give me far too much credit...

This morning, despite it being half term, I was supposed to return to school to do some coursework. Ten minutes before I should have been there, I crawled out of bed and looked in the mirror. To put it lightly, I look rougher that a badgers backside.

I thought it better to not turn up at all, than waste the morning trying to frantically get ready and be far too late. The logic may be lost on you, but when its a toss up between stay in the comfort of your jammies doing the work and have an earful from the teacher for being late and spend all morning attempting to regain the use of your ear, I'm pretty definite you'd make the same decision.

Particularly when the work in hand was music coursework... Now all I have to do is come up with a reason for why I wasn't there...

Apologies and Sandwiches

I realise that it's been a while since I posted anything, but I'm trying to catch up ^^ I think it only fair if I blog a rather long one today...

Cut me some slack though, I mean, it is half term after all...

Anyway, I was talking to some friends the other day about some good times we'd had on our Germany trips. I went on to mention the Sandwich or Dignity dilemma to them and they requested it be blogged...

So the story goes like this... Me and my two room-mates were in our hotel room in Germany. We'd been to a theme park that day, and were all given packed lunches containing two sandwiches, an apple and some sweets. The hotel had made too many packed lunches, so all of the extras were given to my friend.

He asked if anyone wanted any extra lunch, and I replied saying I'll have another apple or two. Instead he gave me three extra packed lunches and ran off before I could complain. So here's me, with eight sandwiches in total, and only ended up eating one of them.

So we were in the hotel room, unpacking from our day at the theme park, and I found the seven remaining sandwiches in my bag. As we were also getting ready for dinner, I thought I might as well eat one of the sandwiches, as they'll be off tomorrow, and I'd also eat less at dinner. Win-win situation.

Well, that was until my teacher knocked on the door... I realised that if someone saw me eating a sandwich before dinner, it would seem as if I was being really greedy.

So I had a milliseconds worth of pause in which I thought... "Sandwich or Dignity...?"

Sandwich.

"Don't come in!... I'm naked..." I shouted, as I threw the sandwich to my side and went to go and answer the door. "Wow, that was quick!" she said. I explained that I was a very fast dresser. She then told me that she'd only knocked the door to tell us it was five minutes till we all went down to dinner. So I carried on getting ready then went off to with the others.

When we got back that night, we had been told to start packing as we were leaving the next morning. I was walking out of the bathroom where I was getting my toothbrush and the like, when I hear one of my room-mates ask loudly "Why is there a half eaten sandwich in the wardrobe?"

I casually walked past him and said, "Oh. That's where it went..." before taking the sandwich off him and continuing to eat it. To put it lightly, he was somewhat confused...

I Hate You Facebook Chat.

Last night, I was on the computer. I went to go and complain to someone about their lack of tags in their photos, as I'd only just found their photos of me, uploaded days before.

So I click on Facebook Chat but they must have logged off as I clicked or something because as I told off, what I thought was the right Emily, was in fact the wrong Emily entirely. This is, therefore, why I hate Facebook Cat.

Observe...

Bad Times With Evil Tweasers

Today I went to my night class at school again, where we study taking computers apart; putting them back together; reprogramming them, etc.

We were finally assigned our own PCs, which we're allowed to dissect for practice. Me and my friend decided we would share our test victim, so as to save time and things.

We were having a good time taking it apart, until one of the other people on the course came over to me and said, "Robert, stick your finger out." So I did... He held out a pair of yellow, plastic, 4 pronged tweaser-things, then held it over the end of my little finger. Then suddenly he let go of the button and they clamped round the end of my finger. I looked up, not in a great deal of pain, but it did smart a little...

Thinking that it was fine, merely a fraction after them closing on my finger, he went to pull them off. Boy did that hurt.

Once again, (a definite running theme, it would seem) profanities erupted from my mouth. However that's not what shocked everyone. Oh nay, they expected me to shout and swear. What did make them jump however, was the fact that the verbal abuse I projected from my lungs was about three octaves higher than they had ever heard me talk.

I like to think this auditory bombardment was a sufficient payback for my somewhat throbbing thumb.

Foot Heritage

I was at a very awesome sleepover last night when one of my friends found out I had partially webbed toes. This surprised her greatly, and she couldn't get over how weird they looked. Every time my toes were anywhere near her she would begin to caress the webbed bit between two of the toes...

Then, inevitably, conversation turned to how come I have webbed toes. I'm pretty sure its a genetic mutation as it is identical on each foot. Most often this sort of webbing is hereditory, so my friend asked if there was anyone in my family who has webbed toes.

Alas, I didn't really know what to say, as my family hasn't kept a complete documentation of our family's feet.

Then she said something quite smart. Well... sort of. She suggested setting up a website called, wait for it.... WEBBED TOES REUNITED.

Yeah. I went there. It was said. But after some serious contemplation, it was still as ludicrous idea as we all initially thought.

Ball Games Gone Wrong

Today I was walking home from school with some friends. One of them was carrying a ball. We were walking next to a road.

One of the others took the ball off him and with no more than two bounces it rolled onto the road and into the path of the ONLY car on that whole road. The result of course, with the help of the inconceivably accurate accident, was said ball rolling under the tires and getting popped.

However, we were in a somewhat built up area at the time, and with those factors the mere popping of the football became an eruption of sound.

Not having seen this go on, I hear an almighty bang behind me, duck and shout at the top of my lungs, "F*** ME!".

Why this choice of words? I don't quite know. But an elderly gentleman cutting his hedge, somehow unaffected by the tremendous bang, seemed quite annoyed at my selection of vocabulary, proceeding to give me the worst of glares until I'd gone out of sight...

I have decided I no longer like football, purely because the balls themselves have made me my first arch enemy...

A rather large squirell

Today I was sat in class, gazing out of the window as the person sat next to me babbled on about Glee or something...

All of a sudden i saw this really huge squirell jump onto a fence in the distance. I shot to my feet and shouted "SQUIRELL!!!".

My friend said to me, "Thats a pretty big squirell..." I looked on in awe at this incredoubly large squirell with the biggest tail you have ever seen, when my friend interrupted my staring to mention that what I was so amazed at was in fact nothing but a cat...

I think I should wear my glasses more nowadays...

The best birthday present of my life so far...

Today, I recieved the best birthday present I have ever been given.

My sister had a Ukulele and I played it quite alot, but now she's off at university, she's taken it with her, leaving me with no uke to play :( sad times.

So three of my friends, three of the most wonderful of friends, have bought me a white (yes I said white! XD) ukulele. It's so AWESOME!!!!

I played it all day at school and all afternoon too. I don't think I've ever been so chuffed with any gift.

I'd just like to thank those people if they're reading (doubt it...) for the best gift this year. Love you guys lots xxxxx

Its so ninja, it's hardly visible...

 

Mangoes

Today I had a science lesson with the teacher who has a problem remembering his abreviations when the head teachers around (see ADH Post).

I'm starting to really warm to this guy, as he gave a rather in depth analogy of how diabetes is similar to the visous ASDA CYCLE. I'm sure I'll explain it soon.

Anyway, I walked into his class and sat down at my seat and in walks one of the other people in my class and sits down while putting a lemon on his desk. The previous lesson he'd had a pineapple on his desk. Spotting the pattern?

Well my biology teacher did. He turned round to this kid and said. "So do you bring in a different fruit each day?", to which we all laughed at the thought.

Then, almost as if in a happier place, he said "Can you bring in a mango?". He pasued momentarily then continued with, "I like mangoes........"

He is now my favourite teacher.

Worked Out...

Yesterday I had been so busy I didn't have a spare minute to sit down and think, "I know, I'll write another blog entry!" This was because I had been worked to the high heavens and back. This might be a long post...

My day started at 8:30 when I had to get up to do various house tasks before getting ready to go off to my music lesson 7 miles away. Then as soon as it was finished, I was given a lift back. But before I could go home and have any breackfast I was dropped off in the high street where I voulenteered in the local Red Cross shop for two and a half hours.

Then the minute I was done with my jobs at the shop, I was picked up by my mum, who took me shopping another 7 miles away. After being dragged, I KID YOU NOT, 17 times around the shopping centre looking for "the perfect pair of Shoes", we finally droove home. When I got home at about 5:30pm I finally had my breakfast, then went outside to wash the car.

It turned out to be harder than first thought, as it soon became a race of time between me, and the ever closer night of a typical British October.

But alas, I did not stop there!!! I then went inside and had to bake 6 tarts and a set of confectionary for my sister at university!

Once all of this was done, I had something to eat then fell fast asleep. What a loooooong day. I'm sorry if this isn't very funny, bit there somehow wasn't time for funny yesterday. =[   Perhaps today will be better...

Fridays...

Friday is that strange day between being to tired to do anything and buzzing with excitement about the weekend.

Amidst all of this chaos there came my rather bald-headed Statistics teacher. I wish I could say he was a man of few words but alas, he prefers to bore me to death with a subject nobody cares about...

While he's away teaching someone else's class and leaving a substitute teacher to teach our lesson, I'm quite contently folding my worksheet into an Oragami Swan.

Halfway through, he returns to my class he's supposedly been teaching for the last two months, and begins to complain that making my work into pretty animals was a waste of my time.

30/30 people in his class consider statistics a waste of time. And he says I dont learn anything...

Controversy

The older generations have recently been expressing their dissatisfaction with this blog, claiming that I "can't possibly write the things [I've] written!"

I had a look back, and its not that bad is it? Ok, I've mentioned a few tender topics, but its just light hearted banter!

Do you think anything I've written is offensive, or should these elderly headaches get back on their chairlifts and decend out of my business?

UPDATE

Previous material considered offensive or inappropriate will be deleted.

Birthday Mayhem

Today its my Birthday! yay, etc. etc...

It's been quite a nice day, all in all. Lots of really thoughtful presents, and some more than thoughtful cards too =]

Anything I haven't enjoyed? Well... there is one thing... one little thing. It's the phrase "Sweet 16". Who came up with that? what's so "sweet about being 16 exactly? I mean, I get a chequebook, I can get a moped licence, and various other things that don't need mentioning... But none of them I'd call "sweet"! the only thing about the whole day that was "sweet" was the cake!!

Anyway... I've had a really lovely day, and want to say thanks to all of my wonderful friends who've made today so special.

Just next time?... Don't all be so lovely at once. It's a little much to take all in one go... I know you want to get it over and done with, but please... give me a moment to breath? Oh, and my blackberry too. So many Facebook notifications all at once, has sent it into meltdown :S

Sloala Koth

Today, my somewhat short friend, or should I say "petite" friend, tried to hug me.

As her tiny hands were incapable of wrapping round me, they just kind if dug into my side, trying to hold on.
This, I decided, was the sort of hug a Sloth would give. A sloth with sharp nails, like a Koala Bear.

I have thus decided to invent the Sloala Koth, a cross between two rather bad hugging animals.

My friend's hugs remind me of a Sloala Koth hug. Unfortunate for her, as she is actually a rather nice person...

Death match gets soundtrack

Today I helped my friend with assembly. He was doing one about a school business club, so the assembly was targeted at a year group, consisting of about 60 pupils.

During this assembly my friend was going to play the very bass-heavy theme track from the Apprentice TV series, as it was business related, however he stopped it so that the deputy head teacher could introduce the assembly.

Half way through his introduction he stopped, as some boys were chatting to each other and not listening. He turned to look at them directly and said, "You. Pay attention."

Without missing a beat, the music accidently cut in to the intro, as if it were some real life theme music to the most epic of fights. Teacher vs. Student. All I can say is, a deputy head teacher, more epic than all 10 seasons of friends combined and a moustache Chuck Norris would be proud of, I'm putting my money on the Deputy head.